Texting some person who is not my sister Lindsay

I was trying to send a text message to my sister but it seems I have the wrong number. I was bored and at work at the time so I decided to have fun with this person. This person is labeled NotMySister below.

Here is a transcript of what happened.

Me:Hi! We never hang out, we need to fix that. (this is the text that was supposed to go to my sister)

NotMySister: Who is this?

Me: Eric

NotMySister: Eric who?

Me: Eric your brother. Is this not Lindsay?

NotMySister: O no this aint Lindsay.

Me: Oh, Sorry.

NotMySister: Its all good.

*about an hour passes*

NotMySister: So....... R u hot

Me: Not overly, I'm the bookish grizzly skinny type. I'm "the nice guy".

NotMySister: How old R u

Me: 27, Yeah, old AND married AND ugly. But at least I'm broke.

NotMySister: O Geez! Thats not that old but thats old enuf. LOL DO u have any young hot sons? Lol

Me: Sorry, no sons. I do have 3 cats though. And a boring job that makes me text people I don't know.

NotMySister: Haha sounds like u have such a fascinating life. Jp So what do u do 2 keep urself 4rm goin crazy?

Me: Alphabetize my fridge, write "One Tree Hill" fan-fiction, make paintings of ducks, knitting, lucid dreaming. You know, the usual.

NotMySister: Haha sounds like ur an average joe. So let me get this straight, u knit 4 ur cats rite?

Me: Well I don't want the little things to get too cold, they need little sweaters and scarfs. Although I guess its not too big a deal, them being stuffed and all.

NotMySister: Ur crazy but ur funny! Lol so ur married rite?

Me: That's right, my wife rules. She's so funny, always telling jokes like "I'm leaving you" "you disgust me" "I hate you forever" HaHa! What a crack up!

NotMySister: Umm...R u sure she's jokin? Cuz that'd b way sad if she was bn serious an u thought she was jus jokin. Lol

Me: Oh yeah. I'm sure. She laughs about it so hard she has to leave the room. Sometimes for weeks at a time. Yelling "I CAN'T TAKE IT!"

NotMySister: Hmmm...Maybe u should lay the smack down no her. Lol jp

Me: Well I'm not much of a smack downer. I tend to be too nice for my own good. I got mugged once and the guy looked "down trodden" so I made him take my watch too.

NotMySister: Now thats sad. U shouldn't b that nice 2 any1. People tend 2 take advantage of u more.

Me: Perhaps your right, I am too nice. I'm going to stop breaking for pedestrians. I'm gonna start stabbing hobos. I'm gonna leave the seat up.

NotMySister: Haha well i'm not talkin bout bn that mean. But hey its a step. Lol

Me: Yeah, have to find that grey area like with my drinking. Not too little and not too much. No more stomach pumps for me!

NotMySister: Ya or somethin huh?

Me: Well, its been weird. Have a good night not my sister Lindsay.

NotMySister: Have a good night not my brother Eric.

The End.